My Idealism

As who am I to try to convince people what the best is. Yet, I acknowledge my basic human right, freedom of speech . Toward the idea of what a retard kind of opinion that might pops up when someone read this. I don’t care. That much.

 It's about my idealism. A simple thought just enough to say what kind of person I am and why I do certain thing. Maybe it's called the core value of a human being - I'm not sure since I was graduated as philanthropist and not a psychologist.

 Anyway, my idealism is as simple as "Treat people the way you want to be treated"

In practice: 

• Don’t bug people unless I want to be bug by them 
• Never say bad things to someone or using bad tones that might hurt them on purpose unless I am ready to be treated like that - heck! I don’t wanna be hurt by sarcasm. 
• Cant let someone feel ignored and unloved coz I've been there and it totally kills.

And other stuff.

My sister was kinda helping me by making it simple and called my idealism as 'a complete egoist'. I heard it as if she's said 'you are an egoist bitch!'. Tells me that I am too ignorant. As much as I love arguing - it's a new branch of sport for me, I can't seem to get this straight with her.

Let me try to make it clear why I think it's a good idealism.

Seeing that I don’t wanna be treated like hell, I try to do good to people. As good as I could. I don’t do colonialism toward people weaker and smaller than me coz they are all human who have hearts. Every moment when I am not under alcohol or high-level of stress, I always think what it is for them. How would I feel if I were them.

I never understand some people who acknowledge themselves as 'caring, nice, understanding' person, but shows different reaction. This is what I meant: have you ever know anyone, who always treat you in a way hurt you, like borrow money from you, and you always let them do that. But once you asked them to lent you money, they were treating you like a beggar who's going to steal his money. RUBBISH!

Or someone whose heart easily hurt when you talk sh*t to them. But they always do the same thing to you? You need to pay attention to what you say to them and look at them! Throw rubbish right into your eyes. OUCH!

I HATE that kind of people.  If I talk rubbish to someone, they can do the same to me. If they disrespect me, tell me one reason not to do that back.

And just because I care and being nice about someone, doesn’t mean I like them or they treat me lightly. There is reason for everything. I just don’t want to let anyone feel alone, unloved, forgotten. I always trying to be A GOOD FRIEND and if that creates misunderstanding or it gives you a reason to bully me. Use me as your garbage can. As your television. As your pillow. Sorry sir. You need to get away at this instance!

Yeah… and still people think I'm an egoist bitch. Life oh life…

Life

Old proverb says, life is like a wheel. One day your on the top. The next day you might be on the lowest bottom. When you are on top, enjoy it. Feel it. It won't last forever. Neither when you're in the bottom. Be strong. Do your best. As one day you will get back to the top and you surely do not want to forget how it feels to be in the bottom.

New proverb says, destiny is in your hands. There is no such thing as coincidence and you are what you made yourself into. Always work to the hardest. Fulfill your inner and outer needs. You will be just fine! There is nothing to put you down.

I am what you call, the combination of old and new. Just like a new year eve. I humbly stated that I totally believe in what you call destiny. The higher power that human can't control. The wheel of life. Yet, I also believe you are the one to determine the speed of its rotation. The faster the speed, the less you would feel the up and down in it.

Anyway, this morning I wonder where is my current position. I figured, probably I am at my bottom with deviations, means I might going there or leave there. Which is fine. Totally. Well… maybe not really.

Graduation and Job? That's my wheel's peak.
Working and Work out? That's my stress relieve.
Myself and Family? That's what I live for (at least now)
Personal Relationship with people who USED TO be close to me? Aaaw… somebody kill me!

I wonder what have I done to make me deserve it. But then again, I'm only human who often feel perfection is my middle name. Maybe I did something in the past that hurt them, and now as the wheel turn down, the karma are going back to me. I am sorry people. For what I did :)

Well… Look at the time. I gotta go back to work! My sweet escape! (Oh no!! I'm losing it).

I might post something again soon. If I'm still feeling blue. Or pink. Or purple.
WATEVER.


The past is the past.
Move on.

It is not the present.
Learn something.

It cannot be the future.
Afraid not.


Move on.
Learn Something.
Afraid not. 

As the past is the past.
Not the present.
Nor the future.

The Over-Nourished and The Mal-Nourished

In my life's book, being an over-nourish woman, I always get so jealous of model like skinny people and how I curse my rather impulsive eating behavior that sometimes turn into a psychological problem. I always think that these skinny people are so damn lucky because they could be so thin, it's amazing in my eyes.

And that's when the devil called "diet" comes to the thought.

Thinking about number of food I've wasted just because I want to look like those skinny person. Number of food I've consumed just because I want to eat them. Impulsively.
Number of food I always left in my plate every time I eat out and order too much or when the lady put too much "things-i-don't-like" on my plate.

Now I turn the page in my life's book. Forget about those skinny supermodel like that I am carving to have body like. Who probably do similar thing as what I 'normally' do but in a more successful way.

There are also other skinny people, who I rarely seen in my life before I was half-forced to turn my eyes into them. The malnourished.

How society, lifestyle, and environment treat them unfairly. These children, come from a very poor family with dozens of children. Their parents only know how to made them without even care to give a proper care to them. Give them $1 and they will gladly spend it on cigars while force their 5 months baby to eat rice that they chew first to make it 'soft enough' for the baby. WTH?!

And one who does care for their baby, do not have enough food or money to buy them food. People like me, with tons of wasted food. Also contribute to what happen to these babies.

If only all the wealthy enough people care to share their food with those who malnourished, perhaps there would be no more babies die because they couldn't get enough food.

People like them, who just want to eat to be healthy but can't afford the food.


vs

People like me, who are blessed with food, but decided to waste them just for stupid reasons.